wAter

that is why i hate playing the hermit, within the crab.
carrying my shell of burdens on my back, filled with the grim past and the dark memories in which hold me back at the wrong times.

i'd seen alot of things screwed up, this too let me do re-access my risk management. Somehow nothing seems right, somehow when i choose to ignore the potion could only last periodically. My back's sloughing and i'm tired. I want to see the light, yet when i saw, i'm afraid to run when my legs are sore, when i'd been cheated too many a times by the trick for the eye.
Mirage-

* * *

head out with Yappa today. guess we'd really talk things out.
and of cos, it really sucks when we're on adult fare.
i'm not complaining, but paying a dollar or 2 for a bus ride is really a pain to my wallet.

& of cos, we drowned in our pitiful alcohol. A jug each is too much for a rite aint it? but this is what happens why 2 guys whom life's filled with trouble came about.

of cos there're physical troubles, but nah i could do with it. Not being physically fit and stuff are okay. But when having multi personas do nothing but wreck thoughts up on my brain. It's a fucking chore when my brain can't think straight.
I thought i might snap for a bit, but i guess i pretty much got myself together, but i'm filled with fatigue. i'd been filling up my calenders with stuff and i really wish things gone well...

I'm paranoid.
imma paranoid bastard who don't see the light.

self interpretation lesson on cancer.
was reading the book: the dark side of horoscope in love
it's a really grim book. DARK, tells u all the cons and weakness u can think off.
like how some horoscope can be flirtatious, wears multiple mask and slices off ur head like a female mantis.
while others tells about how stubborn u can be, causing damage to ur surrounding.

Anyways, mine's one of the worst i guess.
i'd a mindset of a swinger, a happy go lucky dude who sees the sun, however that's not what my star'd been. They're pessimistic regardlessly. They hog on to the past like no other. i hate history, but some things just are engraved so hard in my heart.
yes, traumatic events could change me, and well maybe for life. & yes i'm very very sensitive an and emotional being.

Our stars just doesn't match, & i just can't get my mind off some stuff that i'd come across.
"cast them off like an used gourd, love them and leave them"
i swear i'm not taking this advice. i want to fight, but how could i slay a dragon with a mere shield?

They say if you love, you become prettier
They say if you love, you change a little
What do I have to do to make the love inside me prettier?
When I think about it, tears came